Holding My Breath

Hey All,

So this will be a fairly serious-ish post. Besides, the only way you'll end up seeing this is if everything is okay. Tired of my vagueness? Well, here is the truth. I'm pregnant! I'm excited and looking forward to prayerfully meeting this little one in March. While I adore being pregnant and have wanted to be pregnant for months and months as soon as I know I'm pregnant the fear of the unknown takes or tries to take over my thoughts and feelings.

As you all know, I'm a used to be labor nurse and while that has some advantages for someone like me it is more a disadvantage. Knowledge is a burden for me. While most of you newly pregnant momma's are probably basking in your newly exciting news, I'm sitting and wondering if everything is okay. I react like a momma who has miscarried though Praise God I haven't ever had one and pray I don't. This is titled holding my breath because I feel like from 4 weeks pregnant to 8 weeks when I finally see my midwife I'm holding my breath praying that everything is okay and that the baby is doing well and the heart is beating.

I honestly thought since this was my second pregnancy and I wasn't actively working in L&D anymore that I wouldn't have these issues which they are better don't get me wrong but still there. Also, so far with my two pregnancies I have spotted. Nothing strikes fear into me then going to the bathroom and seeing spotting when pregnant. Hubby is never concerned especially since we spotted with Maggie and she's obviously our healthy, beautiful and energetic 18 month old. So, I'm only writing this because I find writing therapeutic. Besides you will only see this if everything is fine and all these drafts end up getting published. That's all for now. Will update soon, though you won't see them for another 4 weeks HA!

Comments

I know those feelings. Hang in there! Glad everything is going well for you. So excited for your growing family!
Momma said…
Thanks Sarah! We're very grateful for this baby!

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